I was at this point where I drank myself where I couldn't function anymore. I would lose jobs. I didn't want to stop even then, but my body – I just knew I couldn't keep living like this. I've been in the Bridge program twice. The first time, I did it because I had to. I bounced around in AA for a long time. I couldn't even put 30 sober days together for years. I was depressed. I would go to work only because I had to pay the bills. That's it. I would work and drink. I wasn't living at all. I went through a divorce—just a whole bunch of dead-end relationships. I didn't want to be around anybody or do anything except drinking.
I prayed and asked God, 'what should I do?' The answer was the Bridge. At the time, that was not what I wanted to hear, but at the end of the program, I knew it was the answer
I absolutely could not have gone sober on my own. At this point, I've been drinking daily for years and years, so I had to do everything all over again sober, just real basic stuff. I knew how to function drunk, but I had to go back and figure how to do that sober. The scheduling, staying busy every day, that's what I needed to keep me busy. And here, I learned a little bit every day, and by the end of the year, I can look back and go, wow, I stuck to a year-long Bible reading program.
What really made a difference this second, and last, time was my surrendering to Jesus. I learned from the first time that if I tried to take control, it wouldn't work. I learned my lesson – all those good habits I made in the program – going to service, talking to my support group, and so on – I maintained. After the first time, I didn't, and that’s when it got real bad fast.
The program teaches you how to keep a group of like-minded individuals around with you at all times. It provides you a micro-environment to show you how to live in the real world. It becomes second nature when you graduate from the program, where you look for and keep a support system. Here, there are people around me that care for me and want me to succeed.
I'm now working on repairing all those relationships that suffered in my addiction, especially with my parents. I'm reconnecting with friends. I have a reason to get up in the morning.